Putting on My Big Girl Pants

I'm not very good at taking chances. Not a quality I admire in myself, thats for sure. When asked to describe myself, I don't generally say things like, "chicken" or "total coward."

But I definitely am.

Some of you readers might remember when I was first toying with the idea of opening Elegant Snobbery. It feels like a life time ago when I had knots in my stomach about whether to post a picture of my first snob for my blog readers to see (here). That was only just mid-December! If it wasn't for the encouragement of my blog readers, I don't know if I would have been able to take that leap and open up my Etsy shop. I just would have been too scared.

My confidence in myself has improved in the last couple of months. Its nice to know that there are people who have my artwork hanging up in their house. A little shocking, as I was never totally convinced that I would be more than just a girl who likes to draw, despite the fact that being an artist has always been what I dreamed of... But I do want to be successful and with every new illustration I draw and every picture that is purchased from my shop, I feel like I am finally reaching my goal.

Needless to say, I was completely appalled with myself when, after reading Macaroni and Glue's blog post about her Trunkt portfolio being accepted, I congratulated her and then went on to say that I could never apply to Trunkt, because I am such a coward. I just sat there for a few minutes, looking at my comment on her blog and thinking, "Well, Marisa, you don't deserve to ever be a success with an attitude like that."

So guess what I did? I put together a portfolio of my own and submitted it without ever giving myself a chance to look back, to ask questions, to doubt... and I got accepted!

I am, of course, excited beyond words. I feel honored to have my work up next to artists that I have admired for months and months. But mostly, I'm proud of myself for taking a leap and not being a total coward. Now, I am actually wondering what giant leap I'll be taking next.

Funny thing is, it doesn't feel so scary.