Sunday, March 28, 2010

Outta the Mouths of Babes: The Frustrated Mom Edition

Annelie, holding out the ginormous bouquet of allergies
she gathered just for me,
despite knowing my house rule:
All Nature Stays Outside

I admit this bouquet is kinda cute though...
even if it did leave me sneezing and scratching at my eyeballs for ages.

Okay, so I know that being a mom is super rewarding and all that... but honestly, I don't get paid enough sometimes. Here are our snippets from this morning, inspired by Wendiwinn and her Sunday Snippets hilarity. Only mine aren't so much hilarious as they are unbelievable.

Setting: Me in living room listening to 4-year old Gracie and 3-year old Annelie playing in bedroom

Gracie [to Annelie]: Open your mouth and you're dead.

Me: WHAT?? Where did you hear that?

Gracie: We're playing Snow White.

Me [muttering to self]: I do not remember that part of the Disney movie. Holy {enter colorful word}, I'm raising a psychopath.


Setting - Kitchen, just after lunch. I'm staring at the floor, eyes bugged out of my head.

Annelie [smiling sweetly]: Can I have a donut?

Me: No, of course you don't get a donut.

Annelie: Aw! You're really mean!

Me: I'm not mean. I told you to eat your lunch and instead you smashed it into the floor with your tap shoes.

Annelie [pouting]: I don't love you anymore.

Me [muttering to self]: Fantastic. And she's not even a teenager yet.

Life is fun.

Hope you're having an enjoyable weekend!



Christopher And Tia said...

awww, I'd smush my lunch into the floor with my tap shoes too, if I couldn't have a donut, haha.

Marie said...

You will look back & laugh at this Marisa! At least it makes all of us (readers) laugh! They're still stinkin' adorable!

ElegantSnobbery said...

Haha, Tia, she *should* have had a donut. All I said was, "Eat your lunch and its yours." But she didn't eat her lunch, she smashed it instead. Hence, no donut.

Marie - I can only hope. I ended up kicking them outside and they're still out there, getting all their energy out. :)

Kearsie said...

Man. It makes you want to relive yesterday when you discovered your kitten is a hermaphrodite.

Also, I'm pretty sure if we were neighbors and we could throw your daughter and my daughter into the same room and lock the door and they would either:

a) kill each other with stuffed animals and Polly Pockets


b) be the bestest friends ever.

w said...


also. i say that a lot. open your mouth and you're dead. only. i say it to the fish. it doesn't believe me anymore.

ElegantSnobbery said...

Kearsie, oh no, because hermaphrodite kitty was giving me quite an ordeal as I tried to keep him from impregnating his sister. yeah, you just read that correctly.

But also, our girls would probably do c.) both of the above.

Winn - That fish knows nothing. I'd believe you.

Much More Than Mommy said...

That wasn't the DISNEY Snow White. It was the PG-13 version with Angelina Jolie as Snow White and Demi Moore as the Evil Stepmother.

Cathy said...

lol gotta love 'em

i got a "mum's a little bugger" muttered from under Daniel's breath after sending him to bed for about the millionth time!

Heather Kelly said...

Oh--we have a rule that flowers stay outside too. Early spring flowers give me migraines. It makes the Easter service at church which my son sings at a BIG challenge.

Disney is a mixed bag.

And my son has already picked out a new mom for those occasions when he doesn't love me anymore. My next door neighbor. *sigh* At least I know he'll be loved.

Julie Dao said...

Your girls are so cute. I think it's a girl's job to make her mom want to tear her hair out! I know I did it to my mom all the time :D She loves me just the same for giving her life a little excitement! LOL

AlyGatr said...

At least it was a donut. Yesterday I found Amelia wandering around the backyard in her rain boots smooshing piles of doggie doo flat. When I asked her if she did it, she said "No Sissy (the dog) stepped on it". About a minute later she admitted that she did it. Fun times. ICK.

Oh and I had a vase full of "bamya bamya flowers" (that's what Amelia calls them) the other day. I don't know what kind of weed they are, but she found every single one growing out in the backyard.

Kelly said...

aw, the joys of motherhood.. :-)

Winklepots said...

Bummer, all that shadowing, waiting for a donut, whilst you were on the phone, didn't pay off. So sad. :oP

While Ryah and I waited to pick up Peri from school, she kept looking at other kids and accused them of being wet. I said, "Ryah, they're not wet, are you wet?" "No, I'm not wet, I'm cute."

ElegantSnobbery said...

Hahaha Holly. She says she's cute about 40 times a day, doesn't she? I love that kid

Linda said...

Love the snippets. I think all kids start as psychopaths and from there it is up to God and Sesame Street to straighten them out.

Anna Liesemeyer said...

ha ha ha! ohhh are too funny. I love the innocent phase when they don't have an opinion! ;) she is so cute!

Lenox Knits said...

I love the ginourmous bouquet of allergies. Such a perfect way to put it. She is a cutie and I love her smart mouth, probably because I don't have to live with it!

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