Monday, July 27, 2009

My Muse Hates Me

She is sadistic and cruel.

She is turning what should be cute, whimsical snobs into drag queens fit to dance at Darcelle's -- which ordinarily I'd be cool with, but right now, Snobs in Drag isn't quite the look I'm going for.

I don't know what the heck is going on.

I've had several requests to add fairy tale illustrations to my shop, specifically my frog prince illustration, which I have to recreate as the original watercolor I painted a billion years ago is just WAY too big to make prints from without costing a fortune. The new sketch (on the right) is the 11 x 14 size, so you can imagine how huge the watercolor is.

I've been so eager to color all my favorite fairy tales. I have all the sketches ready to illustrate: The Frog Prince, The Little Mermaid, Rapunzel, Little Red Riding Hood...

I really want to color them in. I really want them to look perfect...

But my muse hates me. She just sits next to me and taunts me.

Pick up violet blue, Marisa. Go on... do it, she whispers in my ear. And then she grins evily because violet blue was the WRONG color.

Add some thicker lashes to that princess, Marisa. Really, she will be lovely, my muse breathes. And then her sadistic laughter fills the room because my illustration, which was supposed to be a she, now looks like a he dressed as a she and named something like Lady Cupcake La Fleur.

Actually, I'm starting to suspect my muse hates children. And crap Barbie fairy tale movies, which Annelie is currently obsessed with. Go figure. They are so hideously terrible they make me want to off myself... and we have ALL of them. It seems that every time Annelie stomps her feet and throws a tantrum because I wont give her more juice, or when she begs to watch Barbie Swan Lake for the umpteenth time, my pictures go horribly wrong.

At least Gracie is having a good time. She loves when my illustrations turn to the dark side, as she gets new coloring pages out of it.

Ball numero uno was the front of the halter, and ball numero dos was the back.

Even last week's knit halter top project ended up badly (aka shredded by the Wrath of Marisa). I finished the entire thing before realizing that the pattern I designed was just flat out ugly. Okay, actually, it would have been really cute, but I couldn't find those darned size 2 knitting needles.

MUSE. What are you doing to me?? I really want some explanations.

And seriously, if you destroy my second attempt at this little miss mermaid, I'm going to ditch you for a new muse and you will be out of a job. In this economy, is that what you want? Huh?

Yeah, I didn't think so. Shape up, lady.



Kristin said...

aww...I hope your muse becomes nicer..;p the drawings are truly beautiful, you are really talented darling..ohh my, I finally saw the previews for the princess and the frog..eeipp..Im soo soo excited to see it..(especially since I live right near new orleans..haha)

Alyssa S. said...

OK, so you know I don't aim to laugh at you...but Snobs in Drag is funny :) As a person with next to no drawing talent, I'm lucky if my people actually even look like people. If it makes you feel any better...I had this hugely inspired week, filled with more jewelry made than I've done in a long no one cares. I don't seem to be getting any kind of love or "hearts" or views out of it. The Muse can be SO mean!

April said...

There COULD be a market for Snobs in drag!!! I'm TOTALLY diggin that mermaid! I'll smack that muse if she doesn't straighten up!

Lynn Kellan said...

If only we could control our Muses...then there would never be "writer's block!"

I commiserate!

Winklepots said...

Muses can be a bitch, sounds like yours is just over playing her part. Your second attempt looks lovely though, so something's going right! :o)

Anonymous said...

I'm really loving the collage element in your work.

I get frustrated sometimes too, I think we all do. It's just more creatively entertaining to read about your drawings going haywire than it is for me to blog about sugar scrubs separating... LOL... or maybe it's just that you have the ability to write so well about your muse having her way with you. heheee... :)

Hang in there miss. Put the ones that are giving you funk aside for a while, and do something fun and quirky... let your muse get her crazy side out, and you'll be back in shape in no time!

Pretty Things said...

I must be missing something because I love them all. And Red Riding Hood is perfect.

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