Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Vampire Miscellany (and Hilarity!)

Item #1:

There's a hardcore vampire lover in our house, and I'll grant you the gift of eternal life if you can guess correctly who it is.

I'll give you a clue: It's not my hubs.

I'll give you another clue: It's not Gracie. (at least not when it comes to the blood-sucking kind of vampire**)

I'll give you another clue:  She wakes up in the AM, grabs a magic marker, and draws vampire bite marks on the side of her neck, and has been doing this for... Oh, I don't know, about a YEAR now??

No, it's not me. I can be slightly unconventional at times, but I'm not a total vampire bite mark-drawing kook. It's this girl:


But she doesn't want to be Bella. No sirree. Sparkly vampire boys aren't her thing (thank heavens). Annelie wants to be everyone's favorite electric guitar-playing, blood-sucking hipster, Marceline the Vampire Queen.

I absolutely cannot blame her. I think I want to be Marceline the Vampire Queen, too.

Item #2:

**Vampire Weekend.

This is one of Gracie's favorite bands.  My kid has awesome taste in music, if I do say so myself.


The other day the girls were playing Wii People Creator (I don't think it's actually called this, but I don't know what the game is really called, so we'll just call it Wii People Creator) and I discovered their latest Wii person. It was a pretty average looking Wii person, by Wii people standards. A head, a body, a name...

My eyes popped out of my head when I saw the name:

F * C K    (only w/out the asterisk. I'm trying to appear rated PG, here)

Yes, that's right, my kids named their Wii person F * C K


Naturally, I blamed my husband. I mean, how else are the girls hearing swear words? Maybe the playground at school - you know how kids are - but certainly not from me!!


Will and I were watching a totally awesome BBC show called Pramface, which has THE BEST soundtrack, and they began playing the song Oxford Comma by Vampire Weekend - yes, this song is one of Gracie's FAVES.

And the F-word was all over the place.


How did I not notice? I've blasted this song from our PA system aprox. 1.5 million times. (itunes claims it's 51 times)

I'm sure this proves that when it comes to music, I'm lyrics-challenged. Also, I'm sure this proves that I won't be winning any Parent of the Year awards. Also, if your kids are coming home from the playground saying the F-word, you probably have me and my children to blame. Sorry.

Item #3:

This video.

This is all over the internet today, and absolutely hilarious. Watch with caution. And by that, I mean, don't take a sip of coffee until you are done watching, or else you might end up with coffee out your nose. TRUST ME ON THIS ONE.

Item #4:

These cookies.

Halloween is a-coming, which I know because the girls can't stop talking about what they're going to be for Halloween this year. To get in the holiday spirit, I'm totally going to make these Vampire Bite cookies. Don't they look disgusting? And by that, I mean fantastic?

You can find the recipe (with pictures!) here at The Mama Dramalogues.

Item #5:

My fellow at-home-mama-writer and friend Melissa Luznicky Garrett has a new book out. 

Since getting attacked by a vampire, I didn’t believe in beginnings. Only endings. Every person born to this world comes with an expiration date, but I had never considered mine. At least not until I met John.

Now the end was all I ever thought about. I woke up every morning wondering if that day would be my last. Venom pulsed in my veins and seeped into my bones, infecting all my vital organs and changing me from the inside out. Slowly killing me.

But I’d welcome death in the end, if only because the alternative was even more frightening. 


Melissa's books are self-pubbed, which means she gets to price them affordably, always. (win!) I just bought this one, and am only about 20% in, says my Kindle. But so far, it's my fave of all of Melissa's books.

You can find it on Goodreads HERE.

and for only $3.99 on Amazon HERE.

And that's all the vampire fun for today! Have a bloody fantastic Wednesday, folks!



w said...

hahahahaha! oh man. he slapped a fish.

Leah said...

Thanks for keeping me up to date on all things vampire :) Also, my kids are lyrically challenged, so I can play songs with bad words all I want. Andrew used to sing about "ladies who want to peepee so high" which was his interpretation of a Red Hot Chilli Peppers song from a year or so ago.

Kelly Polark said...

Holy shocker! My kids love to make those Mii characters on the Wii too! One was named Sh@thead. (I'm kidding :).
I love all your kid stories, Marisa! They always make me giggle!
And speaking of vampires, I wore a tshirt yesterday that says, "Only Vampires Can Love You Forever." :)

Unknown said...


hahaha, Leah!! My kids love Foster the People's Pumped Up Kicks, but they think the lyrics are "you better run, better run, faster than my mother" instead of bullet. I obvs. don't correct them :D

Dianne K. Salerni said...

Oh, yikes!!! What did you say to your kids about the Wii Character named you-know-what??? How did you even begin???

Unknown said...

Kelly - hahaha, I like the sound of that shirt.

Dianne - I pretty much stood there, stunned before I remembered to send them to their room... then my hubs took a picture to send to all his friends. *sigh* And of course, we had a talk about language.

They KNEW it wasn't okay to write. As soon as the kids realized I saw it, they tried to delete it. (little too slow, kids, a little too slow)

Unknown said...

First of all, THANK YOU for sharing the news about my book! *blushes*

Annelie is totally my kind of girl. I love everything vampire, too. LOVE IT! Although, I'm more into romantic vampires vs the icky gruesome kind.

As far as naughty music, we like P!NK around here and, um, yeah . . . not the most appropriate at times.

Crystal Cook said...

This is the best blog post I've read in a loooooong time. :)))) That twilight video is HILARIOUS!!!! Oh my goodness, side cramp. Too. Much. Laughter.

And I so can relate to your parent of the year moment. Every time my kids do something I get mad at them for it takes me about five hours to realize that I did that exact thing before they did that. GOod example mom. :)

mshatch said...

love the cookies. And too funny about the kids naming their wii character the bad word.

#1 hubs said...

Next on the play list from marisa;
Smack my B*tch up by the prodigy!

Laura Pauling said...

That video was hilarious! And that's too cute about your daughter. Somehow I'm not surprised! :) I mean that in the best way possible! your family is creative!

Meeling said...

Lol! Funny how we sometimes don't notice things that are so blatantly obvious!

Made for e very funny story!

*ok I"m not making this up - my "prove you're not a robot word"!*

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