Monday, May 4, 2009

The Little Twerp

She only LOOKS sweet and innocent

I've had it coming my entire life.

"Just you wait until you have a daughter Just. Like. You," my mom always warned. Of course I just laughed and rolled my eyes.

And then I had a daughter Just. Like Me.

Little Annelie Cecelia. She looks so sweet, so adorable. But in reality, she's a whirling dervish of high energy and non-stop trouble-making. Every time I call my mom and exclaim, in complete exasperation, "Listen to what Annelie just did... I don't know what to do with her!" My mom just laughs and says, "Yep. She's just like you."

Annelie's latest escapades involve sneaking into the bathroom (I'm not sure how she gets past the childproof doorknob covers but, like Houdini, she can get past anything), locking the door behind her, and then getting into all sorts of trouble. The toilet gets flushed repeatedly, the sink over flows, and about 2 inches of water is often found on the bathroom floor. Meanwhile, I'm clawing the doorknob with a bobby pin, and hollering, "ANNELIE! Turn off that water RIGHT NOW!" and "ANNELIE! Flush that toilet one more time and you will be on time out FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!"

And when I see her doing naughty things, and I shout out my usual exclamation of surprise, "HEY!"

... Annelie just closes her eyes and croons oh so sweetly, "You've got to hiiiiide your love away."

When its time to paint, she watches me very, very carefully, just waiting for the moment when I turn my back and she can paint a kitty nose onto her face.

When its lunchtime, she waits until I get up to fetch her a glass of water, so she can shove some peas in her ears.

When its bath time, she waits until I blink, so she can dump a handful of water on the bathmat.

And when its time to get lunch made, she stands directly behind me, waiting for the moment when I turn my back on the fridge and forget to close the childproof lock, so that she can grab the carton of yogurt and run into the living room as fast as she can. And when I notice her, not two seconds later, the damage is already done, of course. Yogurt on the carpet, in her hair, smeared all over her face...


She's a twerp.

But I do have to give her some credit. She is the most affectionate little two year old, for at least a few minutes every single day... well, every single night... well, wee hours of the morning, because I find that the only moments of the day in which Annelie sits still for a cuddle, is when she wakes up in the middle of the night.

"Mama. I wanna cuddle me," she always says. And so I hug her and hug her and hug her some more, remembering the days when she was a sleepy little baby and wanted nothing more than to just be held and adored.

I'm sure I'm making a mistake for taking the time to cuddle her in the middle of the night. I don't know what the Super Nanny would say, but it would probably be along the lines of, "Mummy, what are you thinking!? She needs to be put back in her bed until she learns to sleep through the night. She's already two, for heaven's sake."

But truthfully, if it wasn't for those midnight moments of sweetness, I probably would have sold her on the black market for $2.50 a long time ago.

Okay, maybe not, but the idea certainly would have crossed my mind more often than it already does.

Circa 1983...
I only LOOKED sweet and innocent, too

Mom, I'm sorry. Thank you for not selling me on the black market for $2.50.

And Annelie... if you don't stop that RIGHT NOW, you are going to be on time out for the rest of your life.



Carry Grace said...

At least she is cute!

Alyssa S. said...

I wonder if it's a "second child syndrome"? Merrick is totally my mischief maker. He seems to have come born with a need to create general disarray. Weird thing is 95% of the time it's like he can't help himself. The other 5% of the time, I see him waiting until I'm looking to mess things up or get into things he knows he's not supposed to. My solution...either I'm sending him to become the youngest ever member of the French Foreign Legion or I'm going to rent him out for demolition jobs.

shiborigirl said...

Oh, I think she's worth more than $2.50! LOL Just remember: "This too shall pass". Whatever stage she's in now will change to something else next week... Hang in there. I think the nighttime cuddles are a nice thing. That's what she'll remember most about you later on.



Marie said...

What a well written and sweet sweet sounds like you're describing my Maddie!

I always believed that God made children so beautiful so that you couldn't be mad at them for too long...that's why all they have to do is cuddle with you or look at you with those big sweet eyes....and the middle of the night thing-she's only 2 and before you know it, she'll grow up and won't want to cuddle with you like that anymore, so I take it while I can.

Oh Mandie said...

I agree with AlyGatr - its got to be second child syndrome, because Gage is quite the lil hell raiser!

I'm laughing though because when I was on the phone with you to other day you were hollering "Hey! Annelie!"

Janna said...

Thanks for the laugh! This cracked me up so much because I can completely relate! Have to agree with AlyGatr about "second child syndrome". I think we have that at our house too. Love your blog!! Your adorable pics of your beautiful girls and funny stories never fail to make me smile and laugh.

April said...

I swear her and my 3 year old MUST be kindred spirits. Lord, the world better watch out for the day those 2 meet!

I'm ready to join in on the $2.50 black market sale whenever you are!!

Lorissa J. Longfellow said...

LOL - It will get better, I know it will.

Momma J said...

I quite often say about my twirps Thank God Their Cute! Gotta luv em!

Diane Duda said...

Hmmm. That's so odd. My boys never misbehaved when they were little. HAhahahahahaha
It does get better though. Just give her 10 years or so.

MoMo's Bows said...

I have to believe that things will get better! My middle child is this way too! He is so bright and has the best sense of humor that I sometimes forget why I am so frustrated with him! Great story....good to know that we are all in this together!

Melanie @ Whimsical Creations said...

LMAO!! Too funny!! Yep, I am getting paid back, too.

Elizabeth @ My Life, Such as it is... said...

There are plenty of days I'd gladly pay someone to take my son or give him away for free. But I have to admit the "I wuvs you Mommy" are so worth the aggravation.

Leah said...

you are scaring son just got tall enough to open doors so I know I'm in for it...

Cathy said...

I totally relate - she is Daniel through and through! Cheeky as...but oh so cute!

hoffee and a nuffin said...

One of the BEST blogs I've read...ever! Sounds like you just described my little Declan... Good luck to us ALL!

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